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Posts Tagged ‘healing’

I sit down in my bed, trying to quiet the mind after a long day. I open my mind towards the Mother and the Father. On an impulse I also greet the Little Sister, the Moon. And, to my own surprise, Frey also comes to mind.

I greet them but realize that my mind is too cluttered with images and thoughts, I can’t put a sentence together. Neither would I know what to say. I try to relax and clear my mind.

All of the sudden, I get somewhat of an insight. I look down on my pale and flabby body, and feel something different than the usual disgust. I suddenly realize that I must stop being afraid of my body. I must not shy away, but accept it. And use it.

I feel something I have never felt before. I feel myself, the real me, residing within this body. It sounds like such a cliché, but I finally understand that the body really is my temple. It is the home in which my spirit lives.

I look down on my body, my temple. For once I look and see beyond the aesthetic, beyond what’s “sexy” or “pretty”. I see the truth.

I have abused this body. By not using it as it is meant to be used it has grown weak. I eat more than I need and thus I gain more and more fat. My food addiction has made sure of that. I look at my legs and see ugly scabs, that I just can’t seem to stop picking open. I feel a slight itch in my scalp, where I’ve also been scratching open the same little scabs over and over again. I look at my fingertips, where I’ve not only bitten down every nail as far as possible, I’ve also chewed around the nails, leaving tiny wounds and irritated skin.

This body is the home of my spirit, and I really should be taking care of it. How can I expect my spirit to thrive when it’s stuck in a wrecked home? How can I expect to get pregnant, to start new life within my womb, when I haven’t even been taking care of myself?

Even now as I write this, I find it difficult to express what I feel. It all sounds so obvious, but these feelings inside of me are far from it. Suddenly feeling myself residing within… my physical body… it’s strange.

I grab the bottle of lavender oil that sits beside my bed, and start to carefully rub some of it into my skin. I need to heal this body. I need to listen carefully what it needs, and never forget how important it really is. It’s not just a piece of flesh, it’s my home.

Now, I will put down the laptop and once again settle down into meditation before I go to sleep. I just needed to write this down. I can not allow myself to forget what I just realized, must read tomorrow what I wrote tonight and remember.

Love and light to you all

/Journeymaid

 

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Because it seems like I’m sick again. My throat hurts and feels all swollen, and I just feel generally crappy. Since I have a job which involves talking more or less constantly I really can’t take this, not again and not right now… Been sick too much already. If it’s not improved by tomorrow morning I’m going to the drop-in nurse and we’ll see what she says. But now for my question for you? Do you have any tried-and-tested rituals or spells for self-healing? Please do tell me of your experiences, if so!

 

I might also mention that I’ve already consumed a whole lot of ginger and honey tea, slept a whole lot and well, that’s it.

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First of all, let me just say thank you for the insightful advice I got for my last post. Know that I listen very carefully to all comments, and I deeply appreciate any honest comments.

Then I’d like to mention one of the things that came up in the comments. I know some people would say that it is bad, or perhaps even evil, do work magic on an unknowing subject. Now I would not say that is the case, so categorically. In this particular case it’s all about me wanting to help a person, and at the same time protect those around her (including myself, yes). In my opinion this is nothing different than calling the ambulance when you see a person in an accident, or calling the police when you see a burglar breaking into your neighbours home. I mean, you wouldn’t wait to get permission from the victim, would you? Of course, this isn’t a clear-cut analogy since practicing magic for someone is more personal, but Í find the most important thing is that the purpose is to heal and protect. I do, however, deeply resepct people with a stricter moral take on this.

I also realize that this is not something I can rush into, I need both practice and preparation. And perhaps, after a bit of preparation I may even find out that the ritual I’m planning isn’t even necessary! I got the advice to at least start by learning how to shield myself from the negative influence, and I think that’s a very good plan. As I menioned in the previous post I have previously asked the Mother for strength, bringing up peaceful energy from Her to help me throughout the day, and while that has helped me somewhat in the moment it hasn’t done anything at all for the root of the issue, and at times the negative energy has still managed to get through to me. And the result of that being instant headaches and general flu-like symptoms, feelings of immense sadness without any real reason, and general uneasiness.

In other words, I need to start putting up real defensive shields.  Now I just gotta find out how…

I am also planning on visiting my mom to pick up some stuff I still have back in my old room.  First of all, I gotta find my old crystal. Then, I gotta bring home my staff. You see, when I was just a kid I found this beautiful naturally straight staff in the woods. I brought it home and carefully peeled off the outer rough layer. Then I carved it with runes and on a hunch I actually… sort of… used my own menstrual blood to empower it. Yea, that may sound a bit icky but I just felt I had to do it. Afterwards, that staff became such a source of protection. It had almost like an aura of warmth and strength. Holding it made me feel calm and protected. I didn’t really realize how powerful it was until after I’d moved out and my mom told me that she’d actually moved it to her room. It helped her through some hard times, and when she was particularly haunted by anxiety she’d even place it next to her in bed while sleeping, and it had comforted her. Just as I had done, which I’d never told her about.

I will bring my staff here, reconnect to it, and hopefully it will help protect me and my home.

So this is where I will start off. If anyone has personal experience using any particular protective spell or ritual I’d love to see it and perhaps try it, otherwise I will try to create my own.

Talk to you later!

p.s. I might lack experience in actual spellwork… but I am a warrior, physically and mentally. And in the end, I will not stop at just protecting myself if there is any chance I can do something about the root of the problem, and in doing so help protect the people around me. That is, if something really is attacking my boss or my work place, I will try to do something about it. It’s not just about me, after all. People get physically SICK in my workplace, and I have to at least try to do something about it. After all, the office did elect me as the safety representative… 😉 If they only knew how seiously I take that task! 😛

 

 

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A couple of years ago, a much loved politician in our country was attacked. I remember hearing it on the evening news, and while not a lot was known then about the details it was clear that she had been stabbed,  and that she had been brought to the emergency.

The whole nation was holding its breath, in shock. To think that such a thing could happen here!

That night, I went to bed early. After hearing about the attack I went directly to my room, feeling that I had to at least try to do something. I laid down on my bed and started going into meditation. I tried to open up and connect to her.  I repeated her name and imagined a string of energy reaching from my body to hers.

I remember feeling the connection establish. Now I was just a teenage girl with limited experience, and I had no illusions of being a great healer or anything. But I repeated my message: Take what you need of my energy. Use my energy to heal and stay alive. 

That was all I could do. I focused intensely on keeping open a link to her and repeated that message, opening up for her to use my energy if she needed it. I fell asleep with that thought.

In the middle of the night I woke up. I could still feel the connection and repeated my message once more.

Then I dreamt a long and quite disturbing dream. I dreamt of telling to young boys that their mother had died.

Early in the morning, I woke again, startled. The connection was lost, it was as if it had been cut. I looked at the alarm clock beside my bed, it was about 5.30. Feeling an incredible sadness but also a sort of stillness, I went back to sleep.

Turned out she had died at 5.30 in the morning in the hospital. She left behind to young sons.

 

 

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