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Posts Tagged ‘Christianity’

Meditated and tried to connect with Odin last night right before bed. Didn’t really feel a connection this time, just peace and quiet. The flame of the candle in front of me seemed to turn into woman with long hair and a heavy cloak. She seemed to be wandering, turning around, searching. Probably just a creation of my own mind, but that’s ok. I felt a pleasant stillness watching her.

Yesterday me and my hubby met with our future neighbours for the first time. Turns out the ones who’ve bought the piece of land right next to ours, is a wonderful middle aged couple, the man being a priest and the woman also working withing the church. My first thought was basically: gosh, I hope they aren’t the fundamentalist kind! But I needn’t worry, they seemed like great people! I liked the fact that they in no way tried to figure out if we were religious. Though, I must say they probably got the impression that we were christian. You see, I spent the first hour or so wondering where I could possibly have met him before. Then I asked, so curious, if he hadn’t been working in the church where I got confirmed. Nope, that wasn’t it. But it turned out he recognized me too from somewhere, but he couldn’t figure it out either. Not even after a long discussion of what social circles we move in, or where we’ve worked (or studied and so on and so on, ) could we find it out. I’m still immensely curious, and I’m almost starting to wonder if we’ve met in a past life or something! Well, probably not but still, it makes me frustrated not being able to figure it out! 😛

The whole meeting also got me thinking about what I really am, I mean when it comes to religion. I probably seem like a christian at first glance, especially if you take into account that I’m confirmed, and happily spent a couple of weeks in TaizĂ©, an ecuminical french monastery. But in the foundation of all churches is the statement that the only way to salvation is through Christ, and I just do not under any circumstances believe that! So I guess then I’m not a Christian after all. But still, I feel connected to God. To me, he is Father. But now, I also feel connected to Mother! And I don’t think the bible was written by God, oh no I’m pretty sure it was written by men.

To answer the question honestly I guess I would have to say that I am a seeker. Right now I am bound to no religion, yet I am open to all. I am searching within myself for the truth, I listen to the heartbeat of nature and compare notes with others who are also on a spiritual path. Similarly, I can’t really say that I am pagan, or heathen. But why then would I try to connect with Odin, for example? As I said, I am searching. Knocking on a whole lot of doors to see who answers. And in the end my belief is never based on what other’s have told me (though I will gladly hear what other’s have to say!) but on my own experiences. And yes, right now I feel pretty happy with that.

You know what… A couple of years ago when I was really depressed due to a very hard decision I had to make, my mom sent me to see a woman who reads tarot. I said I had a tough decision to make but didn’t say anything about what it was all about, nor gave any hint as to the nature of the choice.

She adviced me, and from what she’d said it was clear which path to choose. But I feared that path, and not wanting to choose I just slipped further into despair. A couple of days later I went to sunday service in the local church, more or less on a hunch. I sat there and listened. And guess what? The priest said almost exactly the same words that the psychic had said. The whole point of that particular sermon was the same advice that I’d gotten the other day! I cried where I sat, the message finally hitting home.

Isn’t that fascinating? The prist and the psychic using almost the exact same words even!

And the choice I had to make? Not gonna tell you! =) But the message had been clear: There are two paths. Both will work just fine. But one of them involves taking a risk and using your talents to win a greater prize. Take the harder path, use the talents given to you. It will be hard but you will succeed.

 

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